Then my kids started playing sports. To be honest, I thought it was cute when they played soccer and didn't kick the ball at all. The whole season. I thought it was funny when Nate said, "Remember the time when I almost kicked the ball?" What's the big deal? He's 4. I certainly didn't play on a team at 4. Or 5. Or 6 even. More often I was surprised that other kids actually did know what to do.
Abby's first season in softball was easy. It was coach-pitch and if they couldn't hit the coaches pitches, they got to hit off a tee. She hit the ball well and once or twice even hit it when the coach pitched. Her next season, she moved out of 6U (for 6 years and under). The girls in 8U were definitely in a different league (no more tee, just 5 pitches from her coach). She held her own as there was one or two kids who were at a similar skill level to her. She did have trouble connecting with the ball. I decided I needed to help her. So I asked her if she wanted to practice at home. She wondered why she needed to practice at home too. I talked to her about getting better and winning. And that's when she threw my words back on me. "Mommy, you told me it doesn't matter if you win or lose. It's just for fun." So I agreed but added, "yes, but it's even more fun, when you do your best and sometimes even win." We practiced and she really enjoyed it when she made contact and got some hits. She started getting hits in her games and had fun. Once she hit the ball about 2 feet and managed to make it 3rd base on base running and an error (or two. To her that was the day she got a "triple." Her third season was a little tougher season, but Abby had fun. She loved the camaraderie in the dugout and the chants. She did pretty well with her fielding but still struggled with her batting. Her coaches loved her as she had a great attitude and did what was asked. But she didn't really want to practice anything beyond the team practices. And I was ok with that. Well, not really, but I tried.
So now it's swim season. And...Ok maybe I am competitive. But my kids aren't. And they are the ones on the swim team. When I asked Abby's swim instructor if maybe it was time for Abby to "pick up the pace?" She agreed with me but said, "Abby's a daydreamer." I keep telling myself "she's 8. She's not that athletic. She doesn't really have athletic parents..." So I am really trying to be ok with my 'daydreaming swimmer."
And then there's Nate... He's just 5 and also in his first season on swim team he's no mini Mark Spitz (extra points, if you get that reference). He can swim. A little. He can swim without touching the wall every 2nd stroke. He just doesn't want the swim team coaches to know, so he won't show them in practice. He was not in the first two meets. And then he asked to swim in the third meet. I was way more nervous than he was. At his age, he is allowed to touch the wall or the lane line, but it's not encouraged. I really didn't expect much out of his first event. Though I am quite sure it had nothing to do with competitiveness, he nailed it. Well, if by "nailed it", I mean he got 5th place (out of 5). But he did nail it in his own way. He swam the 25 free without touching the wall at all. It took a few minutes but it was a priceless moment. He was so proud of himself. And so was I.
My kids are who they are. I don't know if they will ever excel in sports. But I do know the experiences from being a member of a team and participating in sports will be invaluable. So I am sure I have quite a few years of stress ahead of me as I watch them athletics or music or any other activity. I just need to remember to enjoy them for who they are.
And, we better save for college, as I am pretty sure there are no athletic scholarships in our future.
